||64||: It All Feels So Crowded

Photo by Wallace Chuck on
It’s not you, it’s me…

“Real luxury is not working like a maniac to take an expensive vacation–it is living a life you enjoy every day.”

Kathy Gottberg, Rightsizing* a Smart Living 365 Guide to Reinventing Retirement.

Have you ever felt that way before? Like you need a vacation away from your stuff. You feel suffocated, and your getaway is more than just a break from life, its a break from the heap of stuff and indecision. Here you are, in a room that isn’t yours, and the space is cleared just for you the guest. The room has nearly everything you need. Sure you haven’t brought everything you own and if someone walked in the room, they wouldn’t feel that it is your place because it isn’t it is a temporary stay.

Well, I want to feel that feeling of tranquility everyday, I want my space to have a tiny mix of getaway and beautiful uniqueness. I’m not talking about black, white, sparse, and possibly medical looking. I’m talking about having your needs met, your essentials, and decor that says I live & rest here, come join me, you can safely rest here.

Still, you are less agitated, all you have to do is possibly make your bed, and put things away where they belong and enjoy the reasons you traveled. Maybe you’ll go to a park, maybe you’ll go visit sights, whatever you do, it all happens with your most important relationships, as you enjoy experiences together.

I’ve felt this way even more during early Quarantine days when I was home for 1-2 months. It was rough looking at my closet, hardly touched and being too sad to get up and wash dishes. Whether you’re working from home, out of work, having a home filled with children who depend on you, or living in solitude by choice or loss. This period has been tough on everyone.

I’ve become increasingly aware on the changes I need to make. Some changes can happen immediately and others will take tiny habits daily to make the noticeable change.

I am doing this for me.
I deserve peace and tranquility.
The only person I can change is myself.
Whatever you do, Whatever you choose to keep in your lifestyle and home. Be sure your home is functional and beautiful within your budget. Life is short. When we focus on what really matters, it’s not much. It’s far less than we own. And it can be scary to admit that, that we actually spent so much of time, talent and treasury on hunting and gathering stuff that we don’t use or need. Sometimes we collected out of fear instead of necessity. I’ll admit that I wasn’t minimal minded as I fearfully hoarded items from March to May.

“But when we really delve into the reasons for why we can’t let something go, there are only two: an attachment to the past or a fear for the future.”

Marie Kondo
This isn’t about shame. It’s about wellness. It’s about showing ourselves more love, seeing things more clearly, and be kind to ourselves during these challenging times. As I encourage myself, a fellow human in need of learning and reminding.
Let this be a gentle reminder: To let go, ever so slightly, and make room for what truly matters.

Sending virtual hugs,

||63||: You Are Important To Me

Photo by Jens Johnsson
There’s a song called, I need you to survive...

“Inspiration can come to us at any time and from many sources….. The story of someone who has succeeded in spite of difficulty can stir our emotions.” 

Jim Rohn

The song came to mind after insightful conversations with two kindred spirits: one online last night with a new creative individual and the other a relative this morning. It was the reminder that I needed to change my anti social and free thinking mindset. The Quarantine has made me so introverted, I’ve been enjoying my own company above all, I’ve become detached and protective.

Still, We need each other. I need you. I want you around. I know, it’s scary and vulnerable to feel like you need another. So I’m talking about balance and appreciation for other human beings or even our furry friends. It is my hope that even with our differences we can coexist and mingle with one another. I listen to you, you listen to me, we agree or respectfully disagree. You share my story. I share mine. There is no shame, simply open minds and open arms. Free to stay and Free to leave.

I’m here to contribute to the greater good of human kind.

I’m here to share spiritual food, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness and self control.

I’m here to embody that energy, practice it daily in hopes that others will choose to do the same.

I’m reaching out to say hello, to tap into the sensitive side that isn’t always available.

We all influence each other, by living, culture, language and things we own that we deem valuable, etc.

Last night, a creative human encouraged me, to share my singing online (I cringed a bit, but I know for sure that it needs to happen). That my need for perfection is a protective mechanism that prevents me from growing. I can admit, I’m scared, I want to do well, and I want others to really connect with my musical contribution. In order to do well, failure must occur, there are no short cuts around it. The best fail.

This morning, my close relative, challenged me to read my Bible for 1 hour a day ( I hear you Bro). And this is right after I told him, I‘m no longer doing religion, I’m more focused on love, and healing, and simplifying my life. Even then, I’ll take the challenge. This challenge has encouraged me the free spirited type to write a schedule that will encourage me to wake up an 1-2 hours early to read, write more, and meditate. I want transformation like the air I breathe. I believe I listened to him, because we respect each other. We listened to each others differences and beliefs throughout the entire conversation (that’s who I am – I make space for people to just be) and I acknowledged my relatives ability to do the same.

“Therefore, no one can take you down his or her path and similarly you cannot lead somebody else down yours. All we can do is simply inspire others to listen and develop their intuition by listening and following ours.”

Michael Hetherington, Developing Your Intuition
Thank you everyone for inspiring me. Thank you for checking in. Thank you for affirming me when I’m not able.

“Inspire others; make others believe that they can do it too. Helping others reach their dreams and get to the point in their life where they are finally happy with everything is the moment I live for.”

Eshraq Jiad

Love & Light,

||59||: Ready for Love

Artist: India.Arie

𝐼𝓃𝒹𝒾𝒶 𝒜𝓇𝒾𝑒,
Her music brought me through some painful, rocking myself to sleep, sobbing, gasping for breath and snotty nose times. My emotions, love for people and misunderstandings of love, kept me in bondage. I remember wanting love so bad, so bad that I would do anything for it.

Continue reading “||59||: Ready for Love”

||55||: Owning My Curves — Scoliosis Warrior

19 Aug 2020

𝙸𝚗 𝚗𝚊𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚎, 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚜 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚒𝚜 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝. 𝚃𝚛𝚎𝚎𝚜 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚋𝚎 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚝𝚎𝚍, 𝚋𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚒𝚗 𝚠𝚎𝚒𝚛𝚍 𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜, 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚢’𝚛𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚋𝚎𝚊𝚞𝚝𝚒𝚏𝚞𝚕.

𝙰𝚕𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚆𝚊𝚕𝚔𝚎𝚛

Continue reading “||55||: Owning My Curves — Scoliosis Warrior”