Hello everyone!!! It started with a voice note and the need to motivate myself and others, so I’m sharing.
This is part of my story as a writer:
The reason I started writing was and still is to put my numerous thoughts on paper. It has been helpful, it feels like a release, like finally the weight I’m carrying can be placed carefully on the weight rack. Then ahhh (deep inhale + exhale) my thoughts have a home.
I have a large family and in a group of many voices, I wanted my voice to be heard. So, to build the courage to speak, I started with writing in my journal, sending letters, poems saved on my flash drive, songs made up on voice notes. I’ve tried many things to soothing myself, in hopes to heal.
As a child you hear and see the motto illustrated “children are meant to be seen and not heard”. I had to be quiet, but I too had feelings and my opinion had to be diluted out of respect for my elders. I didn’t want to wait my turn to talk, I wanted to share my thoughts immediately.
So I turned to writing. I kept many journals, I’d daydream in class with scribbles and doddles on any paper. I also had a chunky monitor and keyboard in my room, I loved that computer that fit carefully in the nook of my room, I was proud of it. My own device to pour out all emotion. I would type like a tap dance across the keyboard. The faster I typed and heard the sounds under my finger tips, the more I felt in control. The more I felt like the driver of my own vehicle. Someone is listening and it started with me. Somewhere in the universe my thoughts were visible even if I was the only viewer.
It takes courage to write. It takes courage to share. It takes courage to think about it long enough and then say the words out loud, yes this is really how I’m feeling, no filter, no chase. Back then I thought, I can’t believe I feel this way, oh well, someone has to say it because no one is talking about it.
Soon I would share my written thoughts with my parents. If we had a major disagreements, I would share a letter with my Mom & Dad, back then my boyfriend and now my husband. Sometimes I’d look back at my text and think Oi! That was harsh. Cringe. I wish I said it differently. That was my frame of reference at the time, That was my level of maturity. It was what I had to offer, and I did my best.
It’s kinda cool and introspective to see how I thought a couple weeks ago or years ago. It’s humbling really, to realize that I’m constantly learning that I don’t know as much as I thought and I’m a sponge soaking up new information for education.
I’ve started and restarted blogging many times, talked myself out of writing. I’ll admit that I am sacred and not always disciplined. Still I keep writing, that’s the important part, to keep on pressing.
It’s a skill to be able to share what you’re feeling on paper and revise and clearly articulate a point of view.
I want to Celebrate now and today this is my 30th post. I am excited to feel and know that I will achieve and pass each mark.
My ultimate goal is to be a writer. And that I am.
I’m a writer paid or not paid, published here and soon on a well known space. I am a writer.
That’s it, Claim it, Own it, Embody it!
Whether or not you think you do it well.
I am who I say I am. I am a writer and I am a singer, simply because I write and sing. Whether or not the world knows my name.
- Continue Doing What You Do: Fine Tuned & Flawed, Keep on working at your craft. I will keep going and I will keep growing.
- Own it! Claim & Declare who you are. (Once you’re doing your craft consistently/deliberately/intentionally, that’s who you are because you say so) Repeat who you are & Affirm yourself daily. I am a writer. I am a singer. I am a creator.
- Celebrate the possible and impossible. I want to write a book, and today I’m claiming it is possible, and will move in the direction of my intention. I am happy and grateful that I’ve completed a book & collection of poems.