“Each year of growth I realize. I’m not who I thought I was. To be completely transparent, who I am on display is a diluted version to adapt to each situation.
I love to be social. In my family we are known to be charismatic and can connect well with others. Then the night ends. I touch down at home, I put my hair in a bun, put on Netflix/Hulu, fix myself a cup a tea and I don’t want to talk with anyone. I become very closed off instantly and need hours to myself. When I get upset I have learned to lock myself in a room, simmer down and think about what made me so mad, even if it means crying and meditating. Then I resolve the issue with in my mind and feel better after writing or talking to myself.
I feel completely free when I’m able to close my door and be my authentic. The version of me when no one is looking. Right now my towel is wrapped around my body and my head is wrapped in a turban because after a hot + cold shower I don’t want to wear any clothes. I don’t always want to speak with eloquence, I naturally want to speak with blunt words that cut to the point. Still I watch my words, reminding myself that words cut deep.
All of this means, I need to take the time to learn about others and not always assume I know them.
As a black woman, I often busting down the walls of stereotypes. I’m not who you think I am. And you are not who I think you are. Pops often said, “Things are not always what they seem”. So this is blog post for myself and any who can relate about learning who you are and learning not to assume we know everyone’s stories. Each of us have lived lives worth sharing in a story filled with lessons. We all have gifts and the power to create. That choice to be who we want to be is a gift. We are peculiar, extraordinary people. So explore who you are and learn to reflect and mind your business (if you are hateful/critical) cause we all trying to make it one day at a time.
Now excuse me while I go relax in solitude.—Truly Treasure”
11 October 2020 @ 10:00 am
“Solitude is not the absence of company, but the moment when our soul is free to speak to us and help us decide what to do with our life.”Paulo Coelho
I like to look back at words I wrote and reflect. During that time I was finding myself, I had come home from college, a capsule I hadn’t fully adjusted to. I wasn’t disciplined with studying, engaging with so many people and the entire confirming culture made me more of a rebel. So I came home started working and became a bit of a loner.
And it’s the same today, here in Nashville. I prefer my own company. At the same time, I appreciate meeting with people who are willing to share who they are, people who have an openness and a come let’s share energy.
At the end of a long day of learning, engaging, service and maneuvering with things, cars and traffic it’s so good to shed my clothes at the door, shower, rest, play music, dance in front the mirror, and really enjoy the remainder of the day It’s my favorite thing, to enjoy who I am in the moment.
My favorite memory of having a tight knit community is when I moved briefly to Maryland. I was told you’ll never find a place like Sligo, and I won’t deny that comment because it’s true. It’s true also because my needs have changed and I want something different. I deeply enjoy that unique area, Takoma Park, the large group of young adults, it was multi cultural exchange of creative minds, energy and late night company. It was grand and the meeting place where I met my partner and introduced him to my new circle.
It’s uplifting and an inspiring gift to have community, people with diverse perspectives, resources and the ability for you as an individual to grow and share your own gift and energy with the group. But until then, I will not place myself just any old place for the sake of taking up time.
I will enjoy the quiet, the gift of solitude where I hope to meditate and manifest what I want and wherever I want to go. I hope to attract people who are beyond religion and rules. I hope to collaborate with people who are true to themselves and love who they are. Others who want to share the books they read and the podcasts they’re into, wondering if anyone else finds it interesting. Others who talk about what deeply disturbs them in the world today and have a passion for helping others who are oppressed.
In the meantime, I will enjoy what will always be with me; my body – the forever home, my voice and the energy I create so that when I join with others, I exude, love, joy, peace and patience. People and things will come and go, in the end, one must enjoy their own company.
“In stillness lives wisdom. In quiet you’ll find peace. In solitude you’ll remember yourself.”Robin Sharma
“Solitude is the great teacher, and to learn its lessons you must pay attention to it.”Deepak Chopra